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Halloween Fic (Already??)

Title: Prompt 64: Fall

Author: Fireness

Beta: None

Characters (Pairings):  The Whole Team (none)

Rating: FRC

Warning(s): Silliness, Halloween, Garcia's evil imagination

Spoilers: None - set slightly AU, because I just had to have Gideon in this fic.  His costume is second best.

Summary: “Hey guys, Garcia’s comin’,” Morgan announced, “and she’s bringing a giant box.”


“Should we be scared?”  Reid asked, only half joking.

Word Count: 1031 (I win!)

Author’s Notes: Jill posted on here a challenge (of sorts) to say what sort of Halloween costumes the gang would wear.  This is my answer, though not really, since it's Garcia who's dressing them, and they're going to a party, not hanging out on the street.  And it's clearly not in Chicago, since Garcia's there - it'd have to be somewhere close to Quantico

Disclaimer: I don't own the Criminal Minds characters.  I only thoroughly abuse them every so often and try to hand them back in one piece.

Prompt 64: Fall (The whole team)


“Hey guys, Garcia’s comin’,” Morgan announced, “and she’s bringing a giant box.”


“Should we be scared?”  Reid asked, only half joking.


“Come on guys.”  Hotch this time.  “We need to act like we’re actually enjoying ourselves at this costume party tonight, so try to get in the spirit, okay?”


“Yeah, but did we really have to ask Garcia to pick out our costumes?  Knowing her, they’re all going to be really…well, it’s Garcia.”


“Hey guys.”  Garcia, breathless.  “Sorry it took so long.”


“What have you got for us?”  Hotch asked, eyeing the sword poking out the top of the box with apprehension.


She grinned.  “A whole lot of fun.  Okay, let’s see.”  She pulled out the sword.  “This is for you, Gideon, along with….aha, wig, fake mustache, and vest.  I figured you’d have a white shirt and a pair of pants to go with these.  How’s your Spanish accent?”


“He’s Zorro?”  JJ guessed, turning the wig over in her hands.


“Zorro would have a mask, sweetie.  Gideon’s going as Inigo Montoya from Princess Bride.”


“Inigo Montoya wears boots,” Gideon pointed out lightly.


“You don’t have a pair of boots?”  He shook his head; she paused, said simply, “Improvise, then.  Uh, sir.”  Gideon sat back in his chair, smiling slightly.




“Right, next we have….ah, for JJ.”  She pulled out a bright pink purse that had a stuffed Chihuahua poking it’s head through the zipper.


“Ohhhh, no.  No way.”


“That’s right, our very own Elle Woods.  Don’t suppose you brought a pink suit with you?”


“I won’t go dressed as Legally Blonde.”


“That’s okay, I guessed at your size, but I think it’ll fit.”  She piled the pink suit on top of the purse.  “I considered Career Girl Barbie, but saw this purse and couldn’t resist.”


Reid reached into the box, pulled out a football helmet.  He grinned.  “Let me guess who this belongs to.”


Garcia snatched it out of his hands.  “Did I say you could go digging through my box?  Hot stuff, this is for you.”  She passed it over to Morgan, along with a jersey, pants, and pads.


JJ leaned over to whisper to Emily, “How did she manage to fit all of this into one box?”


“It’s a bit like Mary Poppins, isn’t it?” Emily said.


In the meantime, Morgan was staring at his jersey.  “I’m going as Brett Favre?”


Garcia peered at the shirt with him.  “Ummm, yeah.  He’s a quarterback, isn’t he?  Aren’t they the ones who tackle people?”


“Not exactly.”


“Oh.  Well, close enough.  Football is football.  Besides, it was either him or Tony Romo.”


“At least Romo plays for the Cowboys.”


“Well, on that note, I almost got a Cowboys cheerleader costume for you instead, but they didn’t come in your size.  Besides, I thought green and yellow would suit your much better.”


“You so owe me for this, baby girl.”


Hotch cleared his throat.  “Moving on?”


“Right, moving on.”  Her box seemed to be emptying as she felt around for a moment before pulling out a wig and another fake mustache, this time both white and fairly ratty looking.  “For Reid.”


“I’m going as Albert Einstein?” he asked, taking the objects from her and looking them over.


“And that is precisely why you are going as Einstein,” she said with a grin.  “I saw the set in the shop and my first thought was of you.”


“Aw, gee, thanks.”


“No problem.  I figured you could just wear your own clothes.”


He stared at her.  “I don’t dress like a early 1900s physicist, do I?”


“I thought the world of geek apparel couldn’t have changed that much in a hundred years.  Just wear a suit and tie, who’ll know the difference?”


“I will, for one.”


“It’s not like it’s gonna be a bunch of geniuses at this party, you know.  Just a bunch of drunk thiry-somethings and one serial killer.  Nobody’ll know the difference.”


“Just do us a favour and don’t set off an atomic bomb in the middle of the party,” Morgan joked.


“Right, and for Emily…” She turned the box over, dumping out a collar, tail, and kitty ears headband.  “Meow.  Just wear a black long-sleeved shirt and black pants or leggings.”


“Is there some logic behind this choice?” Emily asked, raising her eyebrow.


“Is there any logic behind Gideon going as Inigo Montoya?”  JJ rebutted.


“I dunno, I always thought there was some similarities in their faces.” Reid grinned at his mentor.


“Would you be offended if I said my first thought was to dress you as Pinocchio?” Garcia asked.


Emily laughed.  “Trust me, I’ve heard it all before.”


“Good.  Just be glad I didn’t get you the slutty kitty costume.”  She tossed the empty box on the floor.


“Uh, Garcia.”  Hotch looked puzzled.  “Where’s my costume?”


“Don’t think I’ve forgotten you, my fearless leader.  My first thought for you was the Tin Man –“


“Because I’m a heartless slave driver?”


“Precisely.  But that’d take too much effort, and it’s not a very good short-notice costume.  So I started thinking what would be really simple and so very Hotch?  Drum roll, please?  You’re going as……Tom Cruise in Risky Business.”


Total silence.


Morgan leaned over to Reid.  “I think I just saw a tumbleweed.”


“Garcia, I’m not going as Tom Cruise in Risky Business.”


“Why not?  It’s perfect – you don’t need an actual costume, just your regular clothes.”


“Where would I put my gun?”


She winked at him.  “I’m sure you can be creative.”




“Fine.  Then how about my second choice: take these sunglasses, dress as yourself and be a secret service agent.  Or FBI, whichever you prefer.  You could even wave your badge around, impress all the drunken thirty-somethings.”


“Hiding in plain sight?”  Gideon supplied.




Hotch sighed.  “Well, it’s better than nothing.”


“Guys, before we go through with this, are we sure David McNeal’s even gonna be at this party?”  Morgan asked


“He’ll be there.”  Gideon, simply.


“How will we know who he is if he’s wearing a costume?”


“Ask around,” Hotch instructed.  “Somebody’s bound to know him.”


“And if he has even a fraction of Garcia’s sense of irony,” JJ said, “he’ll probably be dressed a Grim Reaper.”




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